I’m Not Wearing Any Pants

The world is a crazy place…

Scotty McCreery

– So Scotty won American Idol last night.  Meh…I guess I could see that coming.  I mean, it’s not like the guy sucks or anything…he’s a very good country crooner and will have a great career as time goes on.  I guess my problem is that I really didn’t think he was the best performer/singer/artist out of the Top 10 that they had this year.  The season certainly wasn’t without it’s controversies (all that positivity, Tyler’s cursing/creepy glares, J-Lo’s improbable musical comeback), but I gotta tell you that I stopped watching entirely once Pia got voted out.

Pia Toscano

I realize that AI is more of a popularity contest instead of a singing competition, but when Pia got voted out as early as she did I just didn’t care about the show anymore because (to me, at least) all credibility in the competition was lost (and I know Random Esquire was also quite upset in learning she was gone…if that tells you anything). In addition, with James gone I didn’t even care about the final three at all…he was my second choice to win the whole thing.  So yeah…thanks, American Idol. I couldn’t care less.

– I am watching The Voice, however.  Do I think the singing is better?  Well…it’s still really too early to tell. I’m intrigued by the gimmicky nature of the show, but I don’t know if fans will tune in once the gimmicks are done (the blind auditions, the “battle” rounds). I didn’t think I’d like the combination of judges that they had, regardless of their fame.  However, I’m enjoying their banter and think all four of them not only have chemistry but have something that AI didn’t have this season with their judges: honesty in their reviews even if it’s not positive.

– Why in the blue hell do people post their lives on Facebook for the world to see?  We’re not talking anonymous blog posts and I’m not talking about pictures or where you are or things of that nature.  But things like this:

Is there such thing as TOO much information?  I mean, do you really need to tell the world that your kid shit on the floor? Do you REALLY need to tell the world that you’re a fuck-up in a blatant attempt to garner sympathy from your friends?

And what’s worse…why are people LIKING these status updates??? What are they liking?  And what’s worse…these are from my sister.  And what’s worse…she’s even more annoying than her status updates in person.

** shudder **

– Remember Chyna?  Wrestling fans should…reality fans might, as well.  It’s kinda sad but once she left wrestling she just couldn’t find any other avenue with her life.  She got into drugs/alcohol, she ended up making a sex tape (doesn’t everybody in Hollywood these days?), she changed her name legally from Joanie Laurer to Chyna just so she could continue to exploit her fleeting fame from her days as a wrestler, and kinda drifted in and around Hollywood doing nothing (she even OD’d on sleeping pills last year).

Oh dear god...

Well…her lust for fame and fortune have resulted in an announcement that’s really five-to-ten years too late: she’s officially getting into porn at age 40. I had the extreme misfortune to have watched her last video, and that really did not scream out “sequel” to me.  However, apparently Vivid has already helped her make a new video called “Backdoor into Chyna” that…ummm…excuse me…I just threw up in my mouth a little and need to go to another topic quickly.  Yikes.

The new cast of Two & a Half Men

– I’m hesitant to admit this, but I might actually try watching Two & A Half Men now that Ashton Kutcher is replacing Charlie Sheen. I doubt I’ll like it, but I’m intrigued enough to give it a shot.  And as for Charlie?  I dunno…I hope the guy can recover his career somehow. He had a sweet gig and now it’s gone.  And because he’s in Hollywood, whatever millions he had in the bank are also probably gone because actors always think money will flow into their lives easily so they spend more than they make.  You’re still winning in my book, Charlie…just don’t go off the deep end again.  On second thought, that’s when you were the most entertaining.  Never mind…get batshit insane again.

– I’m “superhero’d” out and I haven’t seen any bloody movies yet.  I mean, I’ll be the first to say I’ve always enjoyed superhero movies of the “new era”…from X-Men to Daredevil (yes…Daredevil) to The Dark Knight. But as I get ready to see Thor tonight I’m already tiring of the superhero movies coming out this summer.  Next on the agenda is X-Men: First Class, which just looks unnecessary to me. I’m sure it’ll be a great movie and all but I’ve got zero desire to watch it.  Then it’s Captain America, which looks good but I’m still a little wary of it.  Can they really make the transition of this character to the big screen and then realistically have him “frozen” so that he’s available for next year’s Avengers movie?  Yikes.  

But then the biggest question mark of them all: Green Lantern. I’m a big Ryan Reynolds fan so I think this movie should be great in terms of the Hal Jordan character, but there is just SOOOOO much special effect work that it’s really going to be a hit-or-miss situation. Will you tire of the special effects after 20 minutes? Will the story be as confusing as it looks?  I dunno…but with another Batman movie being made, a “reboot” of Spiderman, yet another “reboot” of Superman, and then the Avengers movie all coming out within the next year or so I think I’ll just about have my fill of superheroes.

– The Hangover 2 has a lot of male genitalia, apparently.  Will that prevent me from watching it?  No, because the first one was really funny an this one looks halfway decent.  But at least you can consider yourself better prepared for all the penis you will see if you go to the movie. I, for one, feel better now that I have provided this public service announcement.

– Anna Kournikova is now a trainer on The Biggest Loser.  Really??

– Sunshine is coming to visit me this weekend.  I don’t think she’s been in my city since January, so this will be quite the special event.  Although having said that, my house is a PIG STY and I need to do some major cleaning in the next 24 hours.  We don’t have any huge plans, but it’ll end up being a pretty busy weekend with the local farmer’s markets on Saturday morning, a double-date with a co-worker and his wife on Saturday night, and then visiting my family again this Sunday afternoon (they LOVE her).  When we’re not running the roads, I’m hoping we can just sit back and enjoy each other’s company, as it was a little hectic last weekend with the kids and it’ll be hectic again next weekend with the kids (but in a GOOD way!).  We definitely appreciate the downtime together.

– I hit my online Relay for Life donation goal!  Thanks to some awesome people I was able to raise $500 online for my team.  At this point, my team has raised almost $3,000!!!  I gotta say that this is pretty awesome.  I’m really proud of the team and I’m very much looking forward to doing this again next year.  For those of you who read this blog and donated, I really do appreciate it.  Thank you so very, very much.

– Oh…for those wondering…no, I’m not wearing any pants as I write this post.  You’re welcome.