Adjusting To Not Being Alone

I read today’s post from my friend, T, and read how she had a weekend alone to herself. She talked about how it was crucial to her ability to refocus and recenter.

As a formerly single guy who shares custody with his child, I remember what it was like to be alone every other weekend. I remember being alone almost every single night, even after Sunshine and I began dating. It ended up being one weekend with my son and another weekend with Sunshine, but every single night during the week it was me all by myself…alone.

To say that it has been a bit of an adjustment over the past six months living with Sunshine and her girls would be a dramatic understatement. Here I am, after six years of living alone every single night, having next-to-zero alone time now. There is rarely any time to myself at all, with the only “alone time” being when I visit my son and he has gone to bed. Other than that, I’m with somebody 24/7.

So it has been quite the adjustment for me to make.

Having said that, I feel that it’s been not only an adjustment worth making, but absolutely the best time I’ve ever had in my adult life. Up until now, I didn’t realize just how much I would love and cherish sharing my life with someone. Even during my marriage, I was shut-off emotionally to the point that I never felt fully comfortable being myself. Here I am now, completely emotionally open and available and freely giving myself to someone who loves me for every single little thing that makes me who I am.

It’s a situation that doesn’t make me really miss “alone time” that much. I’ve come to realize that my time isn’t that anymore…it’s “our time”, and I couldn’t be happier about it all.

Right now, I’m living the life I’ve always wanted but never knew it. I thought would crave “alone time”, but I’m now dreading it. I want “our time” on a daily basis, and my feeling is that when the conditions are right that’s just how it’s supposed to feel.

Sunshine & CBG

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