Not Quite There Yet

I was absolutely giddy with excitement at the thought of spending the weekend with my son. I hadn’t seen him in two weeks (other than some video chats) and couldn’t wait to spend some time with him.

The weekend has come and gone and, for him anyway, it was just another weekend.

I say that because he was talking about how much he wanted to go to his mom’s on Saturday, primarily because of the dog and the new cat that reside there. They are his best friends and he loves being with them. She also has toys and games coming out of the woodwork, and those are things I just can’t compete with.

But the weekend was good and we had a good time, so I don’t want this to sound like a “complaint blog”. Far from it, actually. What I found was that I was the one having issues with being away from my son, not him. To him, I’m still living in the city. He even said that he’d show me something when he came to my house this week.

So because of that, there isn’t that sense of “OMG it’s a weekend with my dad!!”, and that’s tough for me to swallow at the moment. I’m going through the “OMG it’s a weekend with my son!!” and it’s tough to know he’s not feeling the same.

It’s not his fault…it’s just been two weeks so he’s not used to things yet. I’d like to think that as the weeks go on and he only sees me on the computer every couple of days, that our weekends together will really be special occasions where he’s not counting the minutes down on a Sunday afternoon until he goes home.

But on the flip side, maybe I shouldn’t be wanting him to feel that way. Maybe what I want is for him to be so comfortable with our relationship that our weekends together are, in fact, “just another weekend with dad”.

Still…it’s been a weird weekend for me. I’m beginning to get used to this move and this change, but I’m not quite there yet.


2 thoughts on “Not Quite There Yet

  1. I bet it is weird for him not to be AS all excited as you are…and maybe that’s just him growing up and going through a phase. But this again strikes me as reason #584 why you are an awesome dad. you WANT him to be excited to see you because YOU are excited to see him. love that.

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