Oh So Close…

There is just so much going on in my life right now. It has gotten to the point where I wake up dizzy at everything that’s going on. I’m on a rollercoaster ride that’s supposed to end soon, yet it just keeps going and going.

I helped Sunshine move into our new home last Tuesday. It was a scorching hot day, we had some friends help out, and we ended up with an apartment full of boxes and bags and no time for me to stick around to unpack. I got up at 5am the next morning and took off for my 2 1/2 hour drive back to my current residence (no longer my “home”). I felt terrible leaving her behind with the mess, but knew I’d be back in a few days for a long  3-day weekend.

On the work front, I haven’t received a phone call for an interview in over two weeks. I have gotten down to a final interview for a potentially great job but I haven’t heard from them on when they want to set it up (they contacted my references last week but I haven’t heard anything since). It’s becoming increasingly difficult to NOT be frustrated at the whole thing. I realize it’s a terrible time of the year to go out looking for work, but I’m not even hearing back on the jobs that I’m applying for (except for that one “Thanks but no thanks” email I got over the weekend).

My supervisor talked to me last week and asked me about when I was moving. I initially said that I couldn’t see myself being there after September 30th, but at this point I’m absolutely petrified that I won’t have a job by then…so I had to say December 31st just to cover myself.

Vacation starts on Friday at 5:30pm. I’m picking up my son and driving 2 1/2 hours to my new home with Sunshine. My daughter flies in on Saturday at 1pm. We’ll have four children (including Sunshine’s two awesome girls) and my Kia Forte for the entire week, which means that we’ll be looking at public transportation for most of our fun. It also means that we’ll probably be relegated to staying in the city for the entire week, which isn’t such a bad thing but it’d be nice to be able to visit my dad or go somewhere that we can all enjoy. Mini-vans are $100+ one-day rentals and practically non-existent at this time of the year, so needless to say we’re pretty much stuck with my small vehicle.

I’m so close to having everything fall into place…sooooo close…yet things seem just out of my grasp at this point. I feel like I’m treading water, and that feeling sucks.

I need to recognize the positivity of my situation, though. My daughter is flying in for a month. My home with Sunshine has a TON of potential. I’m GOING to get a job because I’m too much of an asset to NOT get a job. I’ve got four kids who think the world of me and a fiance who loves me like no other ever has or ever will. I’ve got a lot of goodness going on in my life.

I’m oh so close…but unfortunately, patience is just not one of my virtues.


2 thoughts on “Oh So Close…

  1. Hang in there. You’re definitely living the dream (I’m completely envious of everything you have right now). As you say, it will just take a bit more time to get “there”.

  2. I love the pep talk to yourself at the end. hey, it’s ok to be frustrated, it’s ok to stress about the situation, but you are taking it in as much stride as possible! And I have a good feeling it’s just around the corner.

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