The Best Part of the Show

I can’t remember when, exactly, the conversation turned from going to a movie on a date to going go a strip club, but that’s what ended up happening in the days leading up to this past weekend.

In the act of full disclosure, I admit to readily going to strip clubs when I was single in my 20’s.  I went a lot, actually.  I’m not proud of it, but that was something I did. Looking back, I can totally see why I went. It’s more than just watching a woman take her clothes off.  When you go repeatedly, it’s because you’ve got other self-esteem issues that you’re trying to overcome…and those issues are either dealt with or hidden.

Luckily for me, I was able to put that life behind me and move on. I last went to a strip club on the night of my bachelor party…and I really didn’t have any intention of going to another one any time soon.

But after knowing that Sunshine was interested in going to one (she has never gone before and even put it on her list of “Date Bucket List” items for 2012), my own interest went up…a lot.

So here’s the deal: we went to the club, we sat there and critiqued, we laughed, we went home.

Seriously…that’s all that happened.   Y’see, I don’t know what we were really expecting from the evening but what ended up happening was that the two of us just sat there and laughed and had a really good time…most of the time at the expense of those around us.

There were some interesting characters…

  • The drunk patron who kept playing the drums and his “air harmonica” through every single song…and even when there wasn’t any music playing.
  • The 40+ year old stripper (or at least the 20-something who had the face of a 40-something). She danced a lot, but the dancing was definitely a way to over-compensate for her lack of looks.
  • The stripper who wore “that dress”, who while extremely attractive couldn’t dance or strip to save her own life.
  • The two young women who entered the club on their own who looked like they were a week late for amateur night (seriously…”Amateur Night” was a week prior). They came in for awhile, had a couple of drinks, danced at their table, and then left when nobody paid much attention.  And no…they wouldn’t have won any contest that I was judging.
  • The food menu that included pizza, chicken wings, and a 12-oz steak.  The thought was maybe we could sit directly next to the dance floor while eating chicken wings.  I mean, that would be able as odd as you could imagine.  And really…how good would a 12-oz steak be at a strip club?
  • The butch, lesbian, 400+ pound DJ who got golf claps from us every single time a stripper was done and she had to come out and wipe down the two poles to make sure they were clean for the next stripper.  No…she didn’t do that good of a job.

Each stripper came out and “danced” to three songs. The first one was supposed to be the tease. The second one was where they showed their breasts.  The third song (after a brief break for a wardrobe change) was described by the DJ as “the best part of the show”. Sunshine and I laughed hysterically every time she said it because it just meant that everybody in the club would be seeing “the naughty bits”.

Trust me…on a couple of the strippers, it really WASN’T the best part of the show.

So in the end, we simply got up and went home.  No big partying. No wild stories. No craziness in the “champagne room”. Just a couple who had a fun time at a place that we probably won’t ever go back to.  I mean, it was fun and all…but the location didn’t really scream out “y’all come back now”.

If nothing else, we at least got to check off an item on our bucket list together.

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15 thoughts on “The Best Part of the Show

  1. I only watched strippers a couple of times and that was longer ago than I care to contemplate at the moment, but the thing I remember most about them was the way they moved.

    They were good looking ladies as I recall, and I did enjoy the show, but there was no great attraction to the unvieling of their bodies. Probably because I could always watch a lady undress in a private location where I could take advantage of the situation.

    Maybe I was just lucky in choosing places that had ladies who could really dance. Have you ever watched kittens play together? Their limberness and fluidity of movement? It was like that. Man! Even at my best I’d have dislocated a dozen joints if I tried some of the moves those ladies performed so smoothly and effortlessly.

    1. There was definitely some impressive “pole work” that reconfirmed my interest in wanting to take a pole dancing class for fun sometime….but overall we weren’t that impressed by their moves…

    2. I’ve been to clubs where the performances were more “entertainment” than “just getting naked”. This club was really about just getting naked. The dancing wasn’t the best…the pole work was virtually non-existent (except for one who was really quite good)…the stripping itself had no playfulness to it.

      But like Sunshine said…most of the show wasn’t really that impressive this time around.

  2. Honestly, from my perspective, it was about what I expected from the experience.

    BTW, when you were giving the character descriptions you forgot to mention that you and I both had the same “favourite stripper”. lol And the creepy old dude next to us who kept staring at me and occasionally blowing me kisses.

    All in all, I’d say it was a memorable evening, and while I can’t see myself wanting to go back to this particular strip club, I’d definitely entertain the idea of going to one in a bigger city with hopefully better talent. heh.

    1. …or with me and M! 😉 I sometimes think the strip club experience is more fun as a group, than as a solo couple, though I have only done it as a group and not with M, so it’s hard for me to compare, obviously. I think you needed more talent, and more friends with you to make it more fun…and you are right though, it’s sort of a ‘go once’ sort of thing, but I DO think the place makes a difference as well. I went to one in Boston and it was totally lame (but supposed to be one of the better ones) yet the one down the street from my sister’s house, a dive? way more fun. And wow, I just wrote *way* too much about going to a strip club. LOL.

  3. Well, I have my own stripper stories care of a man who was willing to pay for it all. (And yeah, it’s all on the blog.)

    You’re right though. I think it depends on your expectations and what you want to get out of it. I definitely provides entertainment when you’re not skeeved out. LOL!

    I find it interesting to see so many different body types. There are many things about women that are beautiful and some… not so much.

    Sounds like you enjoyed yourselves!

    1. For the record…I *LOVE* your stripper stories (heh).

      But yeah, at the end of the night it was just a fun experience. Of course, it was what we made it out to be. It wouldn’t have been the same with anybody else.

  4. No way could I pass by without reading this post, haha…you got my attention. Never been, but now I kind of want to, if nothing else but for the people-watching. Can’t wait to see my husband’s reaction to that! 🙂

  5. Nice piece. Thanks for sharing it. When I first saw your reference to a date at a strip club – I thought, God, Canadians, not that anyone would ever stereotype Canadians, strip clubs, and beer together.

    But now that I’ve read it, I have to smile.

    I don’t mind sin, but I really think it should be private. I was in Las Vegas earlier this month and all the public decadence strikes me as in very bad taste. I’m too cheap to gamble but I love the desert.

    So finally I went to a strip club as part of a bachelor party for a friend. And like you and Sunshine I found the characters there much more interesting than the strippers. Watching the strippers I was struck by how cold their eyes were and how they never really connected to anyone. I thought if I were to actually to catch the eye of one of the strippers it would freeze my heart.

    1. You can tell when strippers are or aren’t having a good time (most of the time they aren’t), and for me that can honestly take away from the experience of it all.

      I like the seduction, I like the show, I enjoy the tease. I’ve been to clubs that provided all three, but it’s a rare occurrence.

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