If you could know the future…

…would you want to know what it holds?

Now think about it for a moment, don’t rush to a decision. If you could now what your future holds, would you really want to find out what that future was?

I pondered this question today and came up with a surprising answer….no.

Why surprising?  Well, if you had asked me this question ten years ago I probably would have jumped all over it.  Of course, I’d want to know my future…tell me all about it!  I mean, I’d be a fool to pass up that opportunity, wouldn’t I?

The problem is that I realize now just what has happened to me over the past ten years and I really don’t think I’d want to know some of my life’s events in advance.  Examples?

– I probably wouldn’t have been too thrilled to know that I wouldn’t find an enjoyable job for another six years. During that time I would not only become unhappy but downright miserable in trying to find a job that could turn into a career.

– Of course, even though I’m extremely happy now in my career I may not have been overjoyed in knowing that I would end up still living paycheck to paycheck.

– While initially happy about learning I was going to find love and get married, I’d be pretty upset knowing that the marriage would have only lasted two years and that the separation would end up lasting twice as long as the marriage itself.

– I wouldn’t have initially been happy knowing that I got my (now ex-) wife pregnant as I never wanted more children.  Yet that would have been a horrific thing for me to think because my son is the greatest thing to ever happen to me and never in a million years would I ever want that to change.

– I never would have wanted to know that my mom would have gotten cancer and have passed away a few years later after a long and brutal struggle against the disease.

– While initially ecstatic to learn that I would eventually find the love of my life and true soulmate, I may not be so happy to know that she lived three hours away and that I would be making the trip every two weeks (although for the record, I’d do it again and again and again if given the option…knowing what I know now).

– It would have been difficult to come to terms with the fact that I nearly had a nervous breakdown a few years ago, only to battle back and change my entire outlook on life.

So many things change as time goes by. Some good, some bad. Some bring tremendous joy while others bring horrific sorrow. It’s simply impossible to know just what can happen and what can change in a relatively short amount of time.

So you if you ask me today if I wanted to know my future?  I’d have to politely decline. Just as I never wanted to know the sex of either one of my children until the day they were born, I’m the same way with my life…

…some things are simply more exciting when you don’t know what’s going to happen next.


8 thoughts on “If you could know the future…

  1. Wow, I love this and the rehash of the last 10 years. It’s true. I would rather not know the future either, but looking back, so many life lessons, so many good things masked as bad (divorce…but finding love again, and better, stronger than before), as well as sad truths (death). I love this post.

    1. Good point, Jobo. What’s interesting to me about my own life is that there have been many things that have seemed negative at the time, but have turned out to be the absolute best thing for me. I think that oftentimes, the negative is a necessary part of the positive – it helps to shape us into the people that we are today.

  2. I don’t want to know…I don’t think it would change my behavior any and I don’t think I would have experienced some of the really awesome things I did on the way!

  3. This is why one of my favorite tenets of A Course in Miracles is this: the removal of judgment.

    Because we have NO idea whether something is good for us or bad for us, judgment is wasteless energy expelled and fear-causing. Trust means… wait and see. What you think may be horrible today, could just be the best thing that ever happened to you.

    Wonderful post, CBG.

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