Tag Archives: long-distance relationships

Sold~!!

soldA few weeks ago, I finally received an offer on my house after months on the market. It was a little bittersweet because I’m losing money on the deal, but I just can’t continue to pay a mortgage on an empty house while Sunshine pays for our apartment in the city. On the other hand, it’s absolutely incredible because it’s one of those “final pieces” required to make my move to Sunshine’s city 100% official.

Over the weekend, Sunshine and I had a “moment”. She was talking about some of the things I’ll have to move and what I’ll have to throw away next weekend when we get the moving truck ready to empty out what’s left in my house. I think she finally realized that this is all REALLY happening.

I think there was always that “escape clause”, of sorts…the one that was there on the off chance that things didn’t work out. There was always that remote possibility that I could end things, move out, and head back to my house.

Nope…not any more.

The finality of me donating some items to charity and selling off everything that I’m not bringing with me really hit Sunshine. She even told me that she hoped that she was worth it in the end.

Kids…there is nothing else in this world that makes me happier than being with Sunshine. Moving to be with her and been an incredibly positive experience and I have ZERO regrets about any of it. I couldn’t be in a more positive space than I am right now.

“Sold”…it’s not just a country song for me anymore. It’s the end of one chapter of my life…and one I’m glad to be moving on from.


Sleepless Weekends

Y’know, I was part of a long-distance relationship for three-and-a-half years. I’ve been sleeping alone for the majority of that time plus two-and-a-half years prior to that once I separated from my wife. It kinda sucked, but it was simply something I had gotten used to over the course of the last six years.

When I moved to live with Sunshine two months ago (it’s still hard to believe that I actually did that), I found that sleeping next to somebody on a nightly basis was the most comforting thing possible. I mean, it wasn’t just “comfortable”, it was “comforting”. It was like every night was the best sleep I’d ever had.

Now my long-distance relationship is with my son. We talk twice a week via video-chat (which seems to be working out extremely well, actually) and I’m visiting him every other weekend. It’s during these times, though, that I’m having the worst sleeps I can remember having.

I can’t fall asleep until midnight or later. I toss and I turn. I wake up repeatedly over the course of the night. I get up in the morning tired, sore, and achy. From top to bottom, it’s one horrible, sleepless weekend after another.

I certainly don’t want to sound like I’m complaining too much, though…I’d take sleepless nights in return for hanging with my son any day of the week. It’s just that I want to emphasize just how much I’ve adapted to living (and sleeping) in Sunshine’s city.

I was talking with my dad this weekend and we discussed how things were going with me so far. He asked me how I liked living in Sunshine’s city. I told him, point blank, that moving to be with her was the greatest decision I’ve ever made in my life.

Sleepless weekends be damned. This was the right move to make.


The Move (part one)

Can’t really talk today…I’m helping Sunshine move into OUR NEW HOME!!

More details to follow, but the first stage of our finally living together is underway today! It all seems surreal at the moment, but it’s actually happening!


The Mini-Vacation

I’m actually preparing for an awesome week-long vacation that’s scheduled for the second week of August, when my daughter flies in from Ontario and my son is with me for the whole week. We’re all going to be in the new home that I am sharing with Sunshine (that STILL has a difficult time sinking in…lol) and it’s going to be a wild and crazy fun time.

But this weekend is going to be a “prelude” to the actual vacation. After having supper with my son tonight, I’m heading off for a 4-day weekend with Sunshine and I’m really looking forward to it. It’s been awhile since we’ve had some quality down time together, so this should be fun.

The down time is necessary, too. I mean, we’ve only seen each other briefly over the past three weeks for when I’ve driven there and back for job interviews. We need some quality time together, y’know?

In terms of the job hunt, I’m still looking and applying for at least one job every single day. While I’ve had some interviews, nothing has materialized yet. I’m doing my best to not get too down on things, though…I know that I’ll get something sooner rather than later. It’s just stressful on a number of different levels. The hope is that something happens within the next month…I really don’t want Sunshine to have to move into our new place and stay there alone waiting for me for very long (not to mention paying the higher rent while I still pay the mortgage on my house…moving away will come in VERY hand on a number of levels).

So a Thursday night with Sunshine and her girls along the waterfront with a ton of activities going on (Tall Ships!), a “date night” taking place either Friday or Saturday night (Ted!), and meeting up (hopefully) with friends on Sunday…this is shaping up to be exactly what the doctor ordered: sun, fun, and laughter.

Is it tonight yet?


The Missed Weekend

Friday morning arrived with the usual last-minute rushing around to make sure I had everything packed to go spend the weekend with Sunshine. You would think that after almost four years of this long-distance relationship that it’d be easier for me to pack up every two weeks, but alas I still tend to rush around in the minutes before I leave for my 9am work day.

The morning came and went…no problem.

Lunch arrived and departed…zero issues.

The afternoon was flying by because I was so busy when I received an email from Sunshine at 4:15pm:

“Company X” wants to interview you!!!!!

 Call Denise at xxx-xxxx.

 Just as a thought, you should probably stop at home and grab some interview clothes to live at my house. Hopefully you’ll be able to get in touch with them and set up an interview on Monday. You should have some interview gear at my house regardless. :-D

 Wheeeeeeee!!!!

This was a pretty awesome email to get. In fact, this job posting was one given to me by Sunshine earlier in the week. It looked like a cool company and a job that was right up my alley. So I went into a separate room and called them as soon as I could.

No answer…had to leave a message.

A little bit later I received another email from Sunshine at 5:15pm:

ANOTHER INTERVIEW CALL!

 Brian X from “Company Y”

xxx-xxxx

I was pretty much getting slammed at this point. I mean, for whatever reason my workplace seems to buzz on a Friday afternoon with things to do. So my email was filling up, my phone was ringing, and my supervisor was over my shoulder discussing a project that needed completion. It was crazy that it was all happening at once.

I didn’t get to call the company until after work was over, thus left yet another message.

So on the surface, this seemed like an unbelievable afternoon. I mean, two interview requests? That’s gotta be a great thing…right?  Right???

Well…the problem was that I wasn’t able to contact either person before the weekend started. This meant that I wouldn’t be able to interview on Monday. This meant that I would have to drive back to Sunshine’s city for an interview once and possibly twice more the following week. This meant at least two trips back and forth…5+ hours of driving for each interview.

Suddenly…once work finished at 5:30pm and both Sunshine and I had a couple of minutes to think it all over…she sent me a message that made my heart sink a bit.

“Y’know…it would be smart if we saved some money and you didn’t come down this weekend.”

She wasn’t suggesting it, but my heart sunk because yes…it made PERFECT sense. I mean, it’s $60 for a tank of gas and that’s one trip there and back without any other changes to the itinerary. Times are tough right now, so when you calculate food and other unexpected expenses that crop up (and the fact I wouldn’t be paid again for another week)…it just seemed like a selfish decision to drive up to three separate times for two job interviews.

And what if I got called on Monday or Tuesday for another interview with somebody else?

I got into the car and called her as I made my way back home to do one of two things: pick up dress clothes or unpack my suitcase. I pretty much knew how the conversation was going to go, especially where I hadn’t heard back from either employer and it was after 5:30pm on a Friday afternoon.

We discussed the situation in depth and came to the difficult conclusion that it would be best if we called off our weekend together.

It totally sucked to come to that conclusion, but there wasn’t really a lot of other possibilities. Plus, if I was going to be driving down at least once over the upcoming week then she would still be seeing me. On top of all that, we are going to be living together within the next two months…so really, this wasn’t that big of a deal in the grand scale of things.

I wrote some stuff…I watched some movies and caught up on my reality television…I cleaned up my spare room in early preparations for my move…I did some laundry…I slept in (which is something I never do). I feel as though I had a VERY relaxing weekend, yet still got some stuff done around the house that I wanted to do.

It sucks, especially after doing this for so long. But knowing that we’ll be waking up next to each other on a regular basis for the rest of our lives really makes this one weekend not seem like such a big deal. In the end, all of the trials and difficult situations will be forgotten as we’re living in our home together.

So we missed a weekend together…but it was for a good reason. And in the end, it worked out quite nicely for the both of us.


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