Tag Archives: job hunting

August 8, 2012

Oh So Close…

By Canadian Bald Guy

There is just so much going on in my life right now. It has gotten to the point where I wake up dizzy at everything that’s going on. I’m on a rollercoaster ride that’s supposed to end soon, yet it just keeps going and going.

I helped Sunshine move into our new home last Tuesday. It was a scorching hot day, we had some friends help out, and we ended up with an apartment full of boxes and bags and no time for me to stick around to unpack. I got up at 5am the next morning and took off for my 2 1/2 hour drive back to my current residence (no longer my “home”). I felt terrible leaving her behind with the mess, but knew I’d be back in a few days for a long  3-day weekend.

On the work front, I haven’t received a phone call for an interview in over two weeks. I have gotten down to a final interview for a potentially great job but I haven’t heard from them on when they want to set it up (they contacted my references last week but I haven’t heard anything since). It’s becoming increasingly difficult to NOT be frustrated at the whole thing. I realize it’s a terrible time of the year to go out looking for work, but I’m not even hearing back on the jobs that I’m applying for (except for that one “Thanks but no thanks” email I got over the weekend).

My supervisor talked to me last week and asked me about when I was moving. I initially said that I couldn’t see myself being there after September 30th, but at this point I’m absolutely petrified that I won’t have a job by then…so I had to say December 31st just to cover myself.

Vacation starts on Friday at 5:30pm. I’m picking up my son and driving 2 1/2 hours to my new home with Sunshine. My daughter flies in on Saturday at 1pm. We’ll have four children (including Sunshine’s two awesome girls) and my Kia Forte for the entire week, which means that we’ll be looking at public transportation for most of our fun. It also means that we’ll probably be relegated to staying in the city for the entire week, which isn’t such a bad thing but it’d be nice to be able to visit my dad or go somewhere that we can all enjoy. Mini-vans are $100+ one-day rentals and practically non-existent at this time of the year, so needless to say we’re pretty much stuck with my small vehicle.

I’m so close to having everything fall into place…sooooo close…yet things seem just out of my grasp at this point. I feel like I’m treading water, and that feeling sucks.

I need to recognize the positivity of my situation, though. My daughter is flying in for a month. My home with Sunshine has a TON of potential. I’m GOING to get a job because I’m too much of an asset to NOT get a job. I’ve got four kids who think the world of me and a fiance who loves me like no other ever has or ever will. I’ve got a lot of goodness going on in my life.

I’m oh so close…but unfortunately, patience is just not one of my virtues.

2 comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , , | posted in relationships

July 24, 2012

Days Go By

By Canadian Bald Guy

I had an amazing four-day weekend with Sunshine. The Tall Ships had sailed into Halifax and it truly made for an amazing sight. Where the waterfront is one of my favorite places in the entire city, it came as no surprise to me that I ended up down there at least once every day from Thursday thru Sunday.

The crowds were heavy, the ships were beautiful, and the weather was absolutely gorgeous. It was truly the long weekend that I needed to re-charge my batteries.

Of course, yesterday not only brought me back to reality with work, but also back to reality with the job search. The days go by and I’m not getting nearly as many phone calls as I would like. I’m applying for jobs every day, but it’s such a crowded market right now with qualified people looking for work that it’s easy for my resume to slip through the cracks (at least that’s what I tell myself).

I’m certainly not giving up and I’m certainly doing my best to not get down on myself, with with Sunshine moving into OUR NEW HOME on Tuesday, it’s really difficult to just sit back and not want to be moving in with her. All a matter of time, I know…but things can’t happen soon enough.

6 comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , | posted in Stream of Consciousness

July 5, 2012

An Up And Down Week

By Canadian Bald Guy

When last you visited the blog, I was practically beaming with excitement about something I couldn’t really discuss on the off-chance that things fell through.

Well…things fell through.

I didn’t get the job that I wanted, even after a second interview. The hunt continues.

I took it pretty hard, though. It’s been tough…living in an economy where jobs are scarce and the workforce is filled with people equally or more qualified than you. I haven’t received very many requests for interviews at this point, which is why I was all over this other job because it really seemed like something I would thrive doing. It’s not only a blow to the ego to not get called for interviews, but it’s scary because you wonder what is going to happen over the next couple of months when so much is going on.

Sigh…

The good thing is that this past weekend was spent with Sunshine and our kids (minus Rugrat, who we’re hoping to fly down next month). My dad drove two hours on Friday to pick up the girls and bring them back to his place, and I brought my son down after finishing work. The kids had a great weekend and I was pretty much smiling from ear to ear the entire time. Why? I’ve finally become “that dad”…the guy who not only loves watching his kids and future step-kids getting along, but also loves being a father to them. I just smiled repeatedly because I could step back and see just how awesome our blended family has become.

And what’s better is that this work week has flown by and I’m getting set to see Sunshine again tomorrow night for the weekend (I’m 90% sure it’s going to happen, anyway). I’ve seen her a lot over the past couple of weeks and it has only gone to make me want to move in with her even more. I’m actually getting a bit anxious over it all.

So with multiple drives back and forth to Sunshine’s city, work, family, and all that other stuff that people get caught up in…I’ve been lacking on my blog posts lately. I’m hoping to get back into the swing of things soon, though. Writing is pretty much the only thing that keeps me sane!

Well…that and my AWESOME blended family!!

8 comments   |  tags: , , , , , , , | posted in family

June 21, 2012

Overcoming Fears

By Canadian Bald Guy

It’s weird…I’m at a point in my life that I really thought I’d be bouncing off of the walls with excitement. I’m signing a lease to a new place with Sunshine on Saturday, I’m preparing to start a new career somewhere, and I’m inching closer to being 40 years old. There is just so much going on, it should be easy to fall prey to being overly excited and putting the cart before the horse.

My problem is that I’m not even hitching the cart up at the moment.

Y’see, I’m actually pulling back a bit leading up to everything because of fear and nervousness. It’s no secret that I’ve always had self-confidence issues, and I actually thought that I was past them as I entered my 40th year. I mean, I’m engaged to the most amazing girl in the world and life seems to be coming together for me.

The reality of the situation is that I’m afraid of failure. I’m afraid of rejection. I’m afraid of being told I’m simply not good enough. So when I found out that there were two voicemail messages for me yesterday from two job prospects, I actually got nervous instead of excited. I sat back and thought about (1) maybe these jobs weren’t good enough for me to take, (2) I actually have to interview for these and I’m not ready, and (3) I guess I should go for it because I can’t get anything better.

It’s silly. I should have been stoked to be contacted as it’s been a month without as much as a nibble. Instead, I got butterflies in my stomach about the realities of actually having to call these people back and move forward with the entire process.

Sunshine told me last night how much she believes in me, but if I don’t believe in myself that others will notice…which is NOT good for a job interview. She’s absolutely right (she usually is when giving me a pep talk).

The job search can be very depressing. I see a ton of jobs that I would love to have…jobs I think I could do well in if I only had a bit more experience in certain areas…and I get deflated thinking that somehow my professional life has passed me by because I don’t have required skills. But then the flipside of the search is that it appears most of the remaining jobs are just minimum wage positions or sales positions requiring cold calling “for competitive compensation”. That’s just not me and I can’t imagine anybody doing that.

What’s left are jobs that not only I want, but (seemingly) everybody else wants, too. Thus, there is always somebody more qualified out there for the jobs that are best for me.

Of course, this is just my lack of self confidence rising to the surface. My interpretation of the job search is probably not nearly the reality of the situation (heck…my ex-wife, who is an HR Generalist, has offered to hook me up with a contact or two via LinkedIn because she believes in me and my abilities), so why do I have this nagging fear of things?

So today I need to walk into the placement agency that wants me for a pretty decent-paying job (very similar to what I’m making now) that looks to be pretty challenging professionally and would pretty good on a resume. Once done there, I need to call back a potential employer about a position that may or may not be a simple call-centre position (sometimes it’s difficult to tell from the job descriptions online), but I need to set that concern aside and call them because it may be my dream job…I won’t know if I don’t call.

I need to kick my own ass and show the world that I’m ready for anything. Of course, what I want to do and what I will do are two different things. Fingers crossed, I’ll get this done.

17 comments   |  tags: , , , , | posted in fears, Stream of Consciousness

May 30, 2012

Hurry Up And Wait

By Canadian Bald Guy

This past weekend was a 4-day holiday for me (gotta love working for American companies). Where Sunshine had to work, I spent lunch on both Friday and Monday with her. Each day we actually didn’t sit down for a meal, but instead we went outside for hour-long walks together.

On Monday’s walk, we had a discussion about my current job search and how it was going. The discussion was more me complaining and beginning to get frustrated with the whole process and her listening to me and trying to knock some sense into me.

Y’see, I only really started looking for a job about 2 1/2 weeks ago. I’ve sent my resume out to placement agencies and I have applied for about one or two jobs a day online. I’ve got five or six different websites that I visit on a daily basis while I scour my way through the junk in order to find something decent.  Here is what I’m finding, though…

There are obviously going to be jobs that I have zero qualifications for. Nurses, IT, teachers…all solid positions if that is the background and education that you have.

Most of the jobs that I’m qualified for are minimum wage positions or slightly better paying call center jobs. With my education and background, I’m not sure I need to be stocking shelves at the local grocery store just yet (but I would if I had to…I’m not “above” any job). I worked in a call center environment for over five years and, while thankful for the experience, couldn’t be happier to be at a point in my life where I don’t have to do that type of work anymore.

The other type of jobs that I’m seeing are all above my experience level: “Senior” business analysts, “senior” project managers, “senior” account managers…companies seem to be looking for others to simply walk into a role and immediately begin banging out results. Well, it’s frustrating to me because I know I could do a lot of those roles with a bit more experience…but how to you get that experience when nobody is looking for a “junior” business analyst or “intermediate” account manager?

So it seems like the job prospects are “all or nothing” positions…either lower end or higher end of the pay scale. And that is extremely frustrating because I don’t see anything that is really at the level that I’m at. I suppose it’s because those people are happy to be working those jobs…as I am now, actually…so they don’t become available. I also suppose it’s because intermediate-level positions are normally hired and promoted from within a company to people who have been there for awhile and have worked their way up.

Sunshine reminded me, though, that it’s only been 2 1/2 weeks. She reminded me that job searches don’t normally end up with results in a day or two. I need to be patient and not get frustrated because I actually have a job of my own at the moment…there isn’t any real rush.

But the thing is that I believe there is a rush.

I want to be living with Sunshine and her girls. I want to try to start my new life in a new city. Knowing that we have a 90% shot at getting a place that looks like a fantastic beginner-apartment for the two of us as of August 1st makes me anxious and antsy to move.

So I told Sunshine last night that if we get the apartment, then I would take just about any job and sell my home in order to be with her. I figure I could continue my job search while I’m in her city…maybe it would be easier if I was actually there. But at least I’d be working and we’d be together and my nights could stop being so damn lonely.

I’m trying to be patient, but it’s totally a “hurry-up-and-wait” situation right now…and I’m not usually good with those.

Wish me luck, kids.

6 comments   |  tags: , , , , , , | posted in love, relationships

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