Confessions From A Cubicle

Confessions from a CubicleSometimes I drift off at work a bit. It’s not like I actually fall asleep or anything…I just let my mind wander. But sometimes on a break or during lunch I’ll hear or read something online that sticks with me.

What I do is just jot something down and then finish the thoughts once I’m home. I haven’t done one of these since last October and had more than a few minutes of downtime yesterday, so I decided to take advantage and throw my thoughts down on paper.

- Here’s a question: When is an all-u-can-eat-buffet not really an all-u-can-eat-buffet? When you’re Bill Wisth from Thiensville, WI. Apparently, this guy ate so much fish at Chuck’s Place that they actually cut him off. It turned into an incident where the police were called and then Bill decided to picket the place afterwards because “people have to stand up for consumers”. Bill is 6’6” and over 350 pounds. He ate a dozen pieces of fish before being cut off, then was given eight more pieces in an effort to get him out of the restaurant. This, apparently, was not enough. Honestly…I’m on the fence on this one. Yes, Bill was eating WAAAAY too much food, but that’s the point of an all-u-can-eat-buffet…isn’t it?

- Have you ever wanted to know what it felt like to be shot? No…most people don’t. Of course, Shawn Mossow’s friend was one of those people who DID want to know what it felt like. So he asked Shawn to shoot him in the leg. Seriously. Shawn, being the good friend that he obviously is, gave in after multiple requests (apparently) and shot his friend with a .22-caliber rifle. With friends like that, who needs enemies? Of course, if you’re dumb enough to ask to be shot then you probably deserve to be shot.

- As a parent, I can understand not wanting to see younger kids grind up on each other like a new-age version of Dirty Dancing. However, I think I gotta draw the line at spraying kids with Lysol at a high school prom. And then on top of that calling them “whores” and “sluts” might be a bit extreme. I think the Manitou Springs High School should re-think who their chaperones are for future dances.

- I’m all for being proud of yourself and your body if it helps boost your self-esteem. I know that I’ve had my own problems dealing with body issues. However, being proud of yourself shouldn’t mean that you can walk around in public totally naked. Last week, 49-year-old Barbara Lafleur walked into not one but TWO New York businesses totally nude. She wasn’t doing anything other than shopping, which makes the situation even more strange. The video below comes from one of the two businesses and yes, it contains nudity.

NSFW

- Since we’re talking about public nudity, how about a large 32-year-old Pennsylvania man who parked his vehicle at a Wal-Mart, stripped down completely naked in the parking lot, casually walked into the store, and then proceeded to steal a pair of socks before wondering off. I mean, if it weren’t for the video you’d think I was making this stuff up. Oh…but this video has a blurry section where it needs a blurry section.

Kinda SFW

- With the impending release of “The Dark Knight Rises“, it only makes sense that somebody would create The Bat-Stache!! Ummm…no story to this. It’s just what some guy did and posted on the internet. Hello 15-seconds of fame!

- How many 6-year-old boys do you know who have been suspended from school for “sexual harassment”? Not many, I’m sure. I mean, at six I can only imagine that the term “harassment” doesn’t even appear on the radar, much less “sexual harassment”. Well…in Colorado a kid was suspended for saying, “I’m sexy and I know it”…the line from the LMFAO song of the same name that was a number one single for a couple of weeks. Apparently Sable Elementary School has a “zero tolerance policy”…which sometimes makes zero sense, as it does in this case.

- Hey…ever think about hiring a clown to surprise your child for their birthday? SURE you have! Okay…now what if that was an EVIL clown that stalked your child for an entire week and ended up hitting them in the face with a pie to “celebrate”?? Yeah…a little weird, right? Some people think this is a great idea, hence Dominic Deville’s business idea of creating a website called “EvilBirthdayClown.com“. I couldn’t imagine intentionally scaring my child. That seems like a form of torture to me.

- This video boggles my mind. For whatever reason, somebody in NYC was dressed up as Darth Vader and he was hanging out with a couple of other guys dressed as Stormtroopers (don’t ask me why…I don’t know). At some point during the day, Vader’s car got a parking ticket. In the video, Vader catches up with a traffic cop and tries to talk his way out of the ticket. Yes…seriously.

Hopefully I can do something slightly more productive at work tomorrow.

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3 responses to “Confessions From A Cubicle

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