Okay…the title of this post really looks bad, doesn’t it. Eeesh.
First off, my son isn’t starving and I’m not looking for any hand-outs. No, my issue is my inability to make my way around the kitchen. I’m a nearly 40-year-old man who somehow finds a way to burn water, so my cooking skills are not the greatest in the world.
To make things more fun, my son has inherited my palette…meaning he’s fussier than I am when it comes to food. He’s only five and yet hasn’t tried a ton of things because he refuses to try them.
Yes…I know…it sounds very familiar.
So I end up having to cook hot dogs, hamburgers, chicken nuggets, fries, chicken breasts, bacon, and the occasional pork chop as primary meals. On one hand, that’s not such a bad thing for a single dad to cook up…easy, quick, and fairly tasty. On the other hand, those are certainly not the most healthy choices in the world and I don’t want him to grow up like me…addicted to junk, overweight, and unhappy.
On the plus side of things, he loves a few healthy choices that even I won’t touch like strawberries and grapes. He also likes potatoes, carrots, and peas…so I suppose that’s better than nothing and opens up a few options for me.
But where he won’t try new things, it makes it even more difficult to come up with options for him to eat. And that brings me to wondering what I can do on a go-forward basis.
I should be happy, though, that he won’t eat JUNK junk food. For example, not only does he never want to drink soda (although his grandfather tries to get him to taste it every time he visits), but he doesn’t eat candy. The only chocolate he likes is plain chocolate either in a bar or in an egg shape. He eats plain potato chips occasionally but won’t eat cake. He enjoys popcorn but hates licorice. He’ll eat vanilla ice cream, but don’t you dare give him ice cream with a flavour attached to it.
He’s an usual kid. His aversion to even trying pizza has me wondering where I went wrong, actually. So I guess this brings me back to wondering what I can do to feed my son.
Is having a fussy child normal? Can I expect his taste buds to change with time? If so, how do I help that progression along?
Sigh…
February 10th, 2012 at 8:15 am
That sounds just like my kiddo, down to the no soda. I think it is pretty normal for kids this age to be picky. I make the exact same lunch for B to take to school every day.
Sometimes I find that B won’t eat a whole apple, but he will eat apple slices. So if there’s something you want him to try, change it up a little bit. Different shape, different way to serve it. Ask his mom what kinds of things he likes to eat at her house. B eats a few things at his dad’s house that I wouldn’t have ever thought of giving him (gnocchi, for example).
Veggies have always been hard for us but B loves black olives and loves kale. I will usually put a bite of veggies on his plate and require that he eat the one bite…I’m not a clean plate mom but I am a one-bite mom.
Will he eat pasta? We do whole wheat pasta a lot either with good tomato sauce (plus you could do a pasta dish with the veggies he likes thrown in or on the side) or with sprinkled parmesan. Good lord, what else do we eat…veggie corn dogs, chicken breasts, cheese tortellini, apple slices, grape tomatoes…you’d think I could remember what we ate this week but I’m drawing a blank.
February 11th, 2012 at 10:55 am
I appreciate the feedback, Bluegal. He does eat pasta but doesn’t normally like sauces with it (though he’ll eat lasagna…strange).
I think I’ll find a way to get him to eat healthy. It’ll take time, though…and a LOT of patience.
February 11th, 2012 at 11:03 am
Honestly, a kid who will eat lasagna but won’t eat pasta with sauce just *thinks* he won’t like it. I think if you could get him to just TRY more foods he would eat a lot more.
February 11th, 2012 at 11:25 am
But that’s the kicker, isn’t it.
February 12th, 2012 at 9:34 pm
My boy likes pasta with sprinkled parmesan only…no sauce.
February 10th, 2012 at 8:16 am
P.S. I think you’ll find that his taste buds will expand and he’ll try new things. Just keep offering them and/or eating them in front of him.
February 10th, 2012 at 9:45 am
I think it’s good to lead by example. If he sees you eating a bigger range of foods, I think that might encourage him to try new things, too. Just sayin’.
With my girls I always told them, “You don’t have to eat it but you do have to try it.” Hell, I STILL use that line on them. My girls eat a pretty wide range of foods.
Try getting him involved in making meals. He’s at the perfect age to “help out” and he might be more inclined to try something new if he helped prepare it himself.
If you make an effort to make meals at home instead of relying on fast-food quick-fixes, he will eventually come around. At this age, I think the fact that he knows he’s got (unhealthy but tasty) options, he milks that for all it’s worth.
February 11th, 2012 at 10:56 am
That’s something I’ve never done before, but as we discussed yesterday it’s something I’m going to start doing going forward. I’m already looking forward to him helping me make supper tonight.
February 17th, 2012 at 1:14 am
I LOVE fruits and veggies – I live off of them and always have – but James still won’t try them.
He makes an effort and used to love EVERYTHING but after he turned two he just woke up one day and decided he liked nothing but chicken and grapes (okay, maybe a few more things than that) and stopped trying new things.
Everyone (including his dad) tells me to give him a plate of what I’m having for dinner and no alternative – that eventually he’ll eat it when he gets hungry enough. That doesn’t work for me. He will just chose not to eat.
Really the only thing I can do with him is teach him about different foods (we touch them, smell them, learn about where they grow, etc), give him a multi-vitamin, and keep encouraging him to try, and keep giving him the healthiest meal I can, using the foods that he *will *eat. (Even if it does get really repetitive.)
February 10th, 2012 at 11:14 am
It sounds like you’ve answered your own questions, stock up with fruit he likes, there is nothing wrong with grapes and strawberries for dessert and snacks (try adding bananas and yogurt over time). He likes potatoes, carrots and peas; on your weekends together you can cook a Nova Scotia dish called “Hodge Podge” (recipes on the web); baked potatoes, beef stew (potatoes+carrots+beef, toss in some parsnips); there are all sorts of dishes to try. Go with trying new things on the weekend, one meal new, one meal tried-and-true and over time, you will discover new dishes he (and you) enjoy. Sign up for cooking classes at a local community college too, it’s a skill and a few classes is enough to learn the basics (the classes I took many years ago were a complete meal each class, dinner and learning in one). Good luck!
February 11th, 2012 at 10:57 am
These are great ideas, batticus. Thanks!
February 10th, 2012 at 11:17 am
I am also of the “you have to at least try it” persuasion. Also, I allow him to have ketchup. Believe it or not, Felix has had more vegetables since I’ve allowed ketchup, that he rarely actually touches, even if it IS on his plate.
I had a hard HARD time with veggies and non-processed stuff until I contacted his daycare and got a list of what he eats there (which is substantially more than what he’ll eat for me)…so we sat down…and talked about the fact that he is going to have to eat the same things at my house.
I think I’m still only at 50% of where I need to be…but slow progress is being made. I often use non supper ideas…for supper. For example, we have sandwiches with some veggies on the side. We have pancakes (where I hide a mashed up banana). I hide spinach in strawberry smoothies. But some things which I have been told he loves at daycare (like red and yellow peppers) he will NOT eat for me. Frustrating….I totally get it. Just keep working at it…i guess it’s all you can do.
February 11th, 2012 at 10:58 am
It’s totally a work in progress, I know. I’ll get there eventually.
February 11th, 2012 at 4:15 pm
The very best thing I did with my son was start cooking WITH him – u learn to cook together and he understands the ingredients and then will try the food. To make it even more complicated um I mean fun do the food shopping together.
My son loves spaghetti bolognase and u can ‘hide’ tonnes of veg in there! My son is nearly six and has only just started having an alternative to water – orange juice and Choc milkshake. No sweets for him Choc only!
Involving him in the decision making process allows him to understand – my son is a thinker and it sounds like yours is too!!
February 12th, 2012 at 11:00 pm
Yeah. We cut up some potatoes and he helped me throw them with some carrots, chicken, water, and French onion soup mix into a slow cooker. He seemed to really enjoy doing it, too.
I’m definitely going to do some different things going forward to get him more involved.
February 12th, 2012 at 9:09 pm
5 years old is very young to be rigid about food. Do you go to restaurants serving foreign foods?
Chinese, Tai, Indian, Italian, Greek, Mexican restaurants have wonderful appetizers that you and your son could experiment with. Make it a fun adventure, bring friends, have a drink…this works well especially for those of us that choose often not to cook at home.
My son likes certain dishes at all these restaurants.
February 12th, 2012 at 11:01 pm
He just doesn’t want to try anything. I could go to all of these restaurants but he wouldn’t try anything. I don’t know how to combat that.
February 13th, 2012 at 5:10 pm
like others have said, i make my kids take a “no thank you bite.” they don’t have to eat anymore if they really don’t like it after that bite (and can say No Thank You!) but they must taste it before refusing. it’s surprising how many times they’ll be making a disgusted face and then have it slowly turn around as they realize it really does taste good.
February 13th, 2012 at 6:33 pm
I might start doing that, actually. But it may have to wait until he’s a little bit older.
February 14th, 2012 at 1:44 pm
Things change and things remain the same. I am also a single parent, also bald, and also in my 40′s. Canadian too as it happens. The difference is my boys are now 16 and 19 and no they have not become less fussy about food.
So whenever they declare a like for a new food I REJOICE. Lately they have discovered a liking for any salad that has feta cheese, and for wheatabix cereal. I only discovered this because some of the “dad” food disappeared from the fridge. The fads never last but I milk them for all they are worth while they are here. I have also discovered that carrots and onions and tomatoes are actually acceptable in a stew or crock pot curry.
Alas mushrooms remain public enemy number one. So much as a hint of a mushroom in any dish renders it inedible.
February 17th, 2012 at 1:00 am
I THINK WE HAVE THE SAME CHILD!
Except that yours will eat a bigger variety of foods than mine will.
Is it sad that I’m jealous? lol
If you figure out the answer, I demand that you share it!
A big part of my little guy’s problem with food is that he seems to have a very sensitive gag reflex. He really does want to try new things occasionally but as soon as its in his mouth, he gags.
I’m lucky in the sense that he WILL eat pizza and it makes it easy to sneak some veggies into his diet. I always blend some into the sauce and as long as there aren’t any onions, he doesn’t notice.
It’s frustrating, isn’t it!?
*sigh*
February 17th, 2012 at 7:14 am
MY son won’t even eat sandwiches!! Guess what he eats for lunch every day?
The answer is “not much”.
Yes…it’s very frustrating.
February 19th, 2012 at 8:15 pm
James’ sandwhiches consist of bread and a slice of cheese – and most of the time he won’t even take more than a couple bites out of it.
Most of his meals end up being some kind of variation of toast. I can’t wait for the day when he decides to start eating what I eat! lol